On
the first Friday of every February, which is designated as American Heart
Month, the nation comes together, igniting a wave of red from coast to coast.
From landmarks to news anchors and neighborhoods to online communities; this
annual groundswell unites millions of people for a common goal: the eradication
of heart disease and stroke.
American
Heart Month, a federally designated event, is an ideal time to remind Americans
to focus on their hearts and encourage them to get their families, friends and
communities
involved.
The first American Heart Month, which took place in February 1964, was proclaimed by President Lyndon B. Johnson via Proclamation 3566 on December 30, 1963.
The Congress, by joint resolution on that date, has requested the President to issue annually a proclamation designating February as American Heart Month.
While American Heart Month is a federally designated month in the United States, it’s important to realize that cardiovascular disease knows no borders.
Researchers reveal that one of the biggest challenges for families is losing a loved one. Whether the loss is recent or it occurred a decade ago, this time of year often highlights absences and brings intense feelings of grief, loneliness and emptiness. You may even feel guilty if you find yourself having a good time.
Innocent gestures may also
spur feelings of sorrow. For instance, receiving a holiday card addressed to
your late loved one from a well-meaning friend who doesn’t know the
circumstances may cause your grief to resurface. On the other hand, it can also
be stressful when family and friends purposely don’t mention your loved one’s
name to avoid upsetting you.
These feelings are all
normal, but to help you get through these tough times, talk about how you would
like to handle the situation with someone you trust. That person can then
communicate your wishes to others. If you want to do something to honor your
loved one, there are different ways you can pay tribute. Choose whatever feels
right. Consider the following ideas:
Place
the person’s picture in a place of prominence at home.
Light
a memorial candle.
Make
a photo album of previous holidays together to focus on positive memories.
Set
aside a time so that everyone who wants to can share a memory or a funny story
about the deceased.
Toast
to your loved one.
Go
to church or synagogue.
Volunteer
to help those in need.
Remember that not everyone
grieves in the same way. There is no accepted norm. You may cry at the drop of
a hat, while someone else is more stoic. Some people may grieve for weeks, and
others mourn for years. Understand that the holidays won’t be the same as they
used to be, but recognize that the “new normal” can be fulfilling in other
ways.
Unlike many, the
holiday season doesn’t officially begin at Halloween, since for me, this season
holds a very sacred place. Thanksgiving opens the season by causing us to
pause, in gratitude for all of God’s blessings. We then enter the season of
waiting and preparation for the coming of the holy child, Jesus Christ. This
season of Advent, the first season on the Christian calendar, is four weeks in
which we focus on the four themes of Advent: hope, peace, joy and love. The
twelve days of Christmas then follows, after which the season of Christmastide
enters in.
By the time you read
this message, the gratitude, preparation, celebration and cleanup of
Thanksgiving will have already occurred. Let’s settle ourselves now and begin
to prepare in a deeper way, to absorb the real meaning of what Christmas should
mean to us. I hope you will join my family in reading the book of Luke for the
month of December so that by Christmas Eve, the decorations, wrappings, tinsel
and other accoutrements that accompany the pagan roots of Christmas to take a
back seat to the true meaning of this sacred season. From our home to yours,
may you and your family be blessed beyond measure, during this most sacred
season.
The sanctuary fills with noise as people greet each other and look for their favorite seat. A family who has never visited before enters through the side doors. This family is on a mission to find a church where they feel like they can fit in, worship, and grow spiritually. Doesn’t sound like an unusual problem—does it?
The difference? This family has a child with autism.
Your church can be an environment where children with autism and other disabilities are welcome.
Autism strikes one in eighty-eight children, making it the fastest growing disability in our world today. The statistics make people scratch their heads and debate the cause. But when a child with autism enters your church, it’s not about statistics anymore.
Families with autistic children strive to make minor things work every day and make sacrifices most people are unaware of. Their goal is to build understanding with those who come in contact with their children. Some situations can be adjusted, while others just have to be given up.
One environment where children with autism and other disabilities should always be welcome, though, is church. Here are four ways you can be a blessing to these precious families:
1. GAIN UNDERSTANDING
The key to ministering to this kind of family is to seek to understand what you don’t know. Get to know them and their child personally. Each child will be remarkably different; there’s really no “one-size-fits-all” approach. Learning how the child’s autism affects their daily routine will help you apply that to their needs in the church building.
Are they highly sensitive to bright lights and noise? See if the acoustics or lighting can be turned down.
Does the fabric on your pews bother the child? Offer to add a softer, removable chair cushion in the sanctuary that the child can use each Sunday.
Small things can make a big difference.
2. A SAFE HAVEN
Some autistic children are able to sit through a church service, while others have a harder time making it to the final “amen” without needing to leave. It becomes hard for families to stay in church, and sadly, many give up entirely. A few accommodations could make all the difference.
Create a room in the church the child can be taken. Choose a room of the church that’s:
Far enough from the sanctuary so overlapping noise isn’t a big problem.
Filled with things like CDs, art supplies, musical toys, and books.
Equipped with a soft piece of furniture (a love seat or large chair) to help with sensory issues.
Been checked by the parents for any issues that may aggravate the child’s autism (fluorescent lighting, creaking cabinet doors, etc.).
This room will be an excellent “Plan B” for those times when the worship service isn’t tolerable for the child. If the child ends up using the room very often, though, the parents will get weary. This is where your church’s ministry can go a step further.
3. A TEAM APPROACH
Helping watch the child will be one of the greatest blessings you can give the parents. It gives them a break and allows them to worship as a couple.
Ministry Team: You could create an autism ministry team, complete with a list of adult workers who are trained to watch the child and someone to lead the effort. Training is as simple as gathering information from the parents and working together in pairs, which provides more physical help and confidence. Make sure all the workers know the parents’ cell phone numbers in case the child is overwhelmed and it just won’t work out. Some days are like that.
Buddy System: Some children have a milder case of autism and will fit into children’s programs, but with personal supervision. This is a case where a buddy system with older teens and college students would help. They would take turns staying with the child, going wherever they go. The buddy may even go into the worship service and sit with the child’s family, should they need help at that time.
4. REDUCING PROBLEMS
Sometimes families encounter problems within a church body simply because autism can be misunderstood, causing fear and poor reactions. Ignorance is the root much of the time. This can be prevented by making the church aware of the disability and inviting members to get acquainted with the parents and, at their discretion, their child.
You can do this through an email, letter, or announcement in the weekly bulletin. It might help to include things like:
Autism information
Particular ways autism affects the child, e.g., sensory sensitivities, obsessions, reactions to change, food allergies, etc.
A request for parents to talk to their children about autism and how to be kind and when interacting with the child
Sometimes including someone with special needs requires special attention. But isn’t that what Paul taught us in 1 Corinthians 12:22–26? All churches can learn new things as we stretch to learn how to relate to autism and other disabilities. After all, each child with a disability represents a family who needs to come to God through Jesus Christ, so they can know and worship the God who makes them whole.
Do you know a family with special needs in your church? Will you reach out to them this week?
On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are not presentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.1 Cor. 12:22–26 NIV
